1) The pooping
How many times a day can a healthy human poop? Apparently the answer is some number greater than 3,000. Seriously, you guys...I had planned on using disposable diapers for the first two weeks before moving over to cloth, but little miss poopykins was going through so dang many of them that I busted out the reusables at only one week. Because I am NOT spending another $30 on something that's going to get covered in poo and thrown in the trash. I did that for 4 babies already. No more pooping on the money. That's my new motto.
2) The impeccable timing
You change her and then feed her and she drifts off to sleep and then you leap up and you tidy up the area around you and you scurry to the kitchen and you make yourself a sandwich and you sit down and you pick up the sandwich and you lean in to take your first delicious bite and....
WAAAAAAAAH! I'M THE MOST STARVING BABY WHO EVER STARVED ON THIS ISLAND OF STARVATION YOU CALL OUR HOME! FEED ME THIS INSTANT OR PAY DEARLY WITH THE BREAKING OF THE EARDRUMS!
3) The ill-fitting clothes
My babies are tall and thin. Footie pajamas that are long enough have neck holes that look eerily similar to t-shirts from the costume rack of the original Flashdance. Sometimes their little arms pop out the top. Then they get REALLY stylish, what with the single-shoulder thing goin' on and all...
4) The ill-fitting clothes
I'm wearing maternity shorts right now. The end.
5) The disappearing mornings
Sometime after your kids are capable of playing, you start to be able to accomplish things in the morning. And you forget what it's like when your morning gets sucked into the black hole of "What the heck just happened?"
6) The soft, rolly necks
Oh but I do love her tiny, soft neck, with it's little rolls just starting to grow. Sometimes I stick my nose right in there. And I just sit.
7) And the smell!
Those 3,000+ daily poops have no offensive odor. None. Except perhaps vaguely of microwaved butter-flavored popcorn. But the baby...oh the baby smells so, so, so, so delicious. Scrumptious. Fabulous. Nomnomnomnomnom......
8) The love
Oh this person you just met, who's so tiny....all you can do is make sure she's okay. Is that a scratch? Is she still breathing? Does this look purple to you? Is that diaper on too tight? And your older kids- "Why is she crying?" and "is she okay?" and "I have to kiss the baby before I can eat/sleep/play/get dressed/exit the room!". And you see that your love multiplied is then multiplied.
9) The love
And people are calling you and emailing you and cornering your husband after Mass and sending things in the mail and praying for you and demanding pictures and their love fills in every corner of your world.
10) The Love
Then you realize that somehow God saw fit to entrust this little person to you because He loves you. And He saw fit to have her be born because He loves her. And He put the two of you together because that's the world He intended, the world made better by you and her together. A renewed appreciation for all your children wells up in your heart, because really? Me? In all my sinfulness and imperfection? I'm worthy of this? But true Love isn't about being worthy, is it. Which, of course, makes you want to be worthy even more.