Saturday, November 16, 2013

Grateful

"Maybe you could go get dressed..."

"Maybe YOU could go get dressed" she giggled.

Then Miss Sassypants set her chin on my shoulder so she could see what I was reading without enduring the extra effort of holding up her own torso.

"Hey, I AM dressed!"  Pointing out the obvious is my favorite hobby.

"Cheater.  You wore that yesterday and then slept in it."

"That's how I roll, girl.  Learn the ways of the time-savin' mastah."

Meanwhile my eldest eats her leftover enchiladas with one hand while reading a book on the ipod with the other.  It's not your typical lunch. It's not your typical day.  Most of us are still in our pajamas.  Recovering from a house full of sickies is not walk in the park.

Except maybe for us it sort of is. 

What I mean is that despite the busy and the mess and the arguing and the miscommunication and the barfing and the grossness, for the most part it's just really nice to be a part of this family.  We really just enjoy each other.  There is an ache we feel when anyone isn't home.  It is fluid and right.  So even when it's been the worst, being together is still the best.

When Lizzy had set her chin on my shoulder, I was reading this heart wrenching story of the unexpected challenges of special needs adoption without proper support.  I tried to imagine the pain of continuous upheaval in a family's life.  I tried to imagine what it would be like to never have peace.  Sometimes there are moments of that here.  Just moments.  And they are so exhausting I have to pray for the grace to survive them and keep trucking on the other side.  I truly cannot imagine what it would be to live in the bad moments almost exclusively.  To have stress be the default setting in the home.  I can't do it.

My husband fries eggs and warms tortillas for everyone else.  No one bothers to set the table.  Lizzy mentions making garlic bread later.  Tommy talks about working on the harp.  The baby naps in her crib.

Maybe I'll curl up on the couch later and finish reading Sherlock Holmes.  If I can ever manage to get my ipod back.

I am grateful for this life.






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22 comments :

  1. I know what you mean. I always sleep better when all of my people are under my roof. What will I do when I lose one to college next fall? #heartache

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    1. You want Killian to convince him to save money??? ;)

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  2. I was reading that this morning too. Heartbreaking. Though we don't have quite as full a house as you and we are in the raging toddler stage with both, I completely agree. It's not the same when one is missing. Pajama Saturdays are the best! Enjoy that sweet family...

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  3. I hope you're not joking about the sleeping in your clothes and wearing them again. Because I totally do that. EFFICIENCY!

    Also, wow that adoption post was an extraordinary thing to read. I'll never forget it.

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    1. Oh my goodness I thought I was the only one, lol! We should start hosting a "What I Wore...Two Days in a Row"

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  4. I am grateful, too. Even in the "tough" moments. I know we have been given so much!

    I just finished reading the Sherlock Holmes short stories not too long ago. I have the whole collection on Kindle but I don't actually own an e-reader yet and I have a hard time reading on the computer :p Looking forward to the novels at some point!

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    1. Not normally a huge fan of TV series, I can, however, highly recommend the 1984 Sherlock Holmes series starring Jeremy Brett. Fantastic!! But, do read the stories first!!

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  5. Yes. My nephew lived with us for five and a half years, coming to us when he was six years old. For five years our life was very much like this. I can't imagine three children like this. And I can't tell you how horribly isolating it is to have children like this. The stress is crushing, waking up every day and putting your foot forward when you know nothing you do will change anything. When he was 12, he started compulsively stealing in addition to his other behaviors, and we couldn't stand it anymore. Our other children were acting out and falling apart, and we had to stop. We started looking for a placement for him. My parents took him in as a last ditch effort to keep in around family. They have had him for a year and a half, and they are already done. He will be 14 in February and was ordered into a residential home by the juvenile court at the advice of his probation officer just last week. Anyway...thank you for posting that story. The biggest heartbreak is the guilt you feel over it all, and this is reinforced by the people around you who think they have all the answers. There is very little help or resources for parents raising these damaged children.

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  6. In the busyness of life is where we find peace.

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  7. Beautiful and so well said.

    www.brasshoney.blogspot.com

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  8. i`m recovering from sickies too... your post makes me feel right, even if my house is messy, routine is gone, and i have no idea about food for today. tks!

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  9. Great post! I really need to start counting my blessings!!

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  10. That sounds like the perfect day (minus the sickness). Blessings abound...

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  11. We're in recovery mode here too. Thankfully we got to see extended family this weekend for a fun turn of events. And that post is most definitely heart-wrenching. There are so many things about it that are so difficult, but I'm glad he wrote it. There are so many families and children that experience the same thing and are in need of healing. In need of support, and definitely in need of prayers. Thank you for sharing your beautiful insight on your present.

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  12. Sometimes it's good when life forces us to slow down. :) Loved this post and definitely share the sentiment.

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  13. Thank you for your post and for mentioning us, Dwija.

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  14. Dweej, I just love this. Shucks. You're so awesome.

    We have that same feeling about us all being home - which makes the work days without Dada so hard on us all. It's like I'm a one-armed legless momma with half a brain. I tried explaining it to a priest...but ya know...sorta a weird analogy, but I think you might know just what I'm talking about. :)

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  15. I've noticed that juuuuuuuust when I've had it up to *here* with one or more of my kids, sickness breaks out. Perhaps it's because the symptoms don't manifest until after we all feel cranky. Or perhaps God gives us that reminder that serving and caring for our littles can be a joy, even when it's totally disgusting. I'm a better mom when my kids are sick.

    Hope you all continue getting better.

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  16. My grandchildren and I are in recovery mode too. Several have had strep, but all have runny noses and I have had a sinus infection.
    That story brings me to the reality of what I consider my own difficulties. I am praying to day for a change of heart in what I considered hardness. God brings so many into our lives to show us the way. Thank you for being His instrument in opening my eyes!

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