This is the perfect time for me to do it. This is, like, blog o'clock. And I've got nothing.
Sometimes I'm scrubbing the dishes (did I tell you that the current kitchen has no dishwasher? Well, it does have one, but it's broken. And it's tiny. I mean TINY. Like...you could not fit a single large stockpot in there. Period. No.) and I think "there's a blog post in here. Something about how I'm always looking for the quick fix and not a lot of work, so I want to leave the dishes to soak and hopefully I don't actually have to do any work to get them clean. And maybe there's something in there about mothering and my spiritual life, too. Regular stuff, soaking, whatever is fine, but sometimes you just have to suck it up and do the hard scrubbing in order to get the results you're hoping for."
Probably a thousand people have already written that post. I don't even know where to take it. But I have that thought a lot these days.
Oh, also...praying for people who make me mad. This is something I totally didn't know was a thing before I converted. I literally did not know that people did that. I believed in prayer but mostly it was "please don't let ____________ happen" and "please make _______________ happen." As you might imagine, my prayer life was pretty dismal.
So. Praying for people who I'm trying hard to love. It's hard, you know? I often don't know what to say (in my head. We're not speaking out loud in this scenario, okay?), so I make myself recite the following super fancy, complicated prayer:
I am praying for this person. This is me praying for them.
Wow. Aren't you super anxious to submit your application to Dwija's School of Awesome Spiritual Tips?
Anyway, those are my non-things that I've been thinking about telling you but feel silly even mentioning.
Katy has been at rehearsal until 11 p.m. the last few nights and it's going to continue until their show closes. Me sleepy.
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| A small portion of the bad-tastical badness that is our current kitchen. Take it in, folks. Take it aaaaaall in. |
Is that single-cabinet-sized thing your dishwasher?? You're not kidding about tiny.
ReplyDeleteI do the "I'm praying for so-and-so," too, because it's hard to know what to pray for sometimes. "Don't let so-and-so be that way" or "Don't let so-and-so do that thing I don't like" seems more like a prayer for myself, haha. So a simple "Please bless that person" keeps it focused on them, which I think is good.
In that situation I usually just say, "I give this person to you." Because I find it really hard to pray for someone that I'm mad at without thinking about how I'm so mad at them and why and then I just get madder. :-P Kind of a "you take this person because clearly I have trouble dealing with this!" I hope there's grace in there somewhere!
ReplyDeleteI love the way you blog, Dwija! Remember there are no rules!!! Raising 5 kids with no dishwasher. Down to the two of us and I couldn't live without it. Well, I could live without it, but don't want to! Good luck on the home sale, fingers crossed, so you can proceed with the kitchen plans!
ReplyDeleteWhen I'm upset with someone, usually our priest-in-residence, who only preaches when our pastor is our of town, which becomes an occasion of sin for me, because I get very upset and fuming during Mass, I recite the Jesus Prayer to drive the uncharitable thoughts right out of my head. Which I have to do right now , because uncharitable thoughts just came into my head.
ReplyDeleteI think about what I'd like someone who was really mad at me to pray... and then I pray that for the person I am mad at. :-)
ReplyDeleteI think about what I'd like someone who was really mad at me to pray... and then I pray that for the person I am mad at. :-)
ReplyDeleteI really really really needed to read that this morning. I have a huge problem with spite and it is very hard to be mad at someone and not wish something bad upon them. I don't even say the bad things out loud, but as soon as I think them I'm asking for forgiveness for those mean thoughts as well as offering up a prayer for those I'm thinking about. It's definitely a work in progress.
ReplyDeleteLove your blog - thanks for keeping it real! It's taking me a long time to come to this point but I find this most helpful, "Jesus bless ________ and have mercy on me." (I lean heavily on the mercy part!
ReplyDeleteI was once taught to ask myself: "What would God's prayer be for that person?" if I can't figure out what to pray for - or if trying to pray for someone I really don't want to pray for.
ReplyDeleteI love your prayer. I don't think it's silly, I think it's a start. I think it's a far bigger problem to think something's too silly or too small and NOT use it as a first step. Thanks for sharing! I know someone that I might need to pray that prayer for today!
ReplyDeleteWe rented a house for a few months with a tiny, non-working dishwasher. I used it as a drying rack for plates, glasses & silverware. Turned out to be pretty handy for that.
ReplyDeleteI have that same missing drawer thing going on in my kitchen! For 2 years now (2 years dear husband! God bless him!) and the cabinet below it hangs open ugh.. But we do have a dishwasher, I put my foot down on that one.
ReplyDeleteWe've never had a dishwasher, unless you count me. Going on twelve years now. Le sigh.
ReplyDelete