Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Grocery Store Evangelization

Do you follow the facebook page for St. Paul Street Evangelization?  You should.  Their updates are totally uplifting.  I love the idea of regular people sharing with other regular people the regular-ness of living a Catholic life.  Does that make sense?  It's not just priests or sisters or church employees or editors of Catholic publications or insert-who-you-imagine-evangelizing-here.  It's you and me.  People just like you and me just standing there having a chat.  It's a beautiful ministry.  Big puffy heart love it.

When I read those updates, sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be a part of a team someday and experience firsthand what those street evangelizers experience.  What it would be like to have a stranger want to just chit chat with you about the faith.  Trying to let the Holy Spirit do the talking for you.  Would it be weird?  Would it be good?  Would I be able to do it?

Then I load five kids into the van and haul them to the grocery store.  We try to stay out of people's way and stick to the list and not cause a scene and not block the aisles and not run into other people's carts.  I try to relax my facial muscles and whisper instead of bark.  I dole out granola bars and sippy cups and guide people by the shoulder with one hand while pushing the cart with the other.

And then the strangers- they start coming up to me.  And they start chit chatting.  And asking questions.  My first instinct until this week has been to think "Lawdy, lawdy.  Can you not see what I'm dealing with up in here, lady?"  But this week, something new flashed into my mind at just the right second.  And that flash was this: I have no literal sign that says "Catholic Truth" on it, but just look at these five living, breathing, sometimes dancing, often squealing signs.  I carry them around with me wherever I go!

People are thirsting for just a little drop of what we've got, y'all.  They wanna know if we're, like, REAL.  Are we really doing this?  Is this really happening right in front of them in the cereal aisle of Meijer?  And you don't have to have a pile of kids for this to happen.  If you have one kid (this used to happen to me when I had just Paul in the cart and my big girls were off at school) and you smile and chatter at him while you shop, people will wonder about you.  How can they get a little bit of what you got?  One lady even stopped me during that era just so she could say "You just really love that baby, don't you?"

On Monday, I kept passing and older gentleman.  Not elderly.  Just older than I am.  At first he said something about a whole lot of something, but he was smiling and I said something like "It's always a party!"  Two aisles later he passed me again as we all stopped to peruse the selection of General Mills dried goods.  This time he said "So are all these children yours?" Now, I know that questionis supposed to annoy me, but really it just makes me laugh because WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD EVER VOLUNTARILY TAKE EXTRA CHILDREN TO THE GROCERY STORE?  No one.  Ever.  That's who.  So I did laugh and answered "yes sir"

Then it was weird.  A strange, far-offish expression came over his face and he just started nodding a bit, like something was finally dawning on him.  Then he snapped out of it and said "Well, I mean, I have six myself.  It's just...nice to see...."  and then I could tell he was nervous and didn't want to overstep his bounds or anything so I nodded and said "Well, we got married young.  What better thing could I do with my time?"

"Yeah.  That's true.  Are you going to have more?  How old are you?"

(it didn't occur to me to think this was weird, right there in aisle 7 of the grocery store at the moment.  roll with it, man)

"Hah!  I'm 33, so...."

"Oh, so you've got some time."

"I do.  I do.  Who knows what could happen?  We'll just wait and see I guess."  Smile again.

He gets that far off look again.  "That's really great that you're okay with it.  Great."

Me, with a little nod, then a shrug "Well, once they're grown, is there really anything better?  Is there anything better than family?"

A smile.  A smile back.  And we went on our separate ways.

Someday, street evangelization.  Right now my work is at the grocery store. 





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38 comments :

  1. This is amazing. Thank you Dwija.

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    1. I'm sure you've changed some hearts on your family trips to the grocery store!

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  2. This is lovely! I wonder what he was thinking in his far-away thoughts. We live in a college town and I always feel like I'm evangelizing around the college students, trying to joyfully show them the beauty of large families... which isn't always so beautiful when they're running every different direction and I'm feeling totally overwhelmed. I know it was huge for me to see big Catholic families as a student, though, so I try to be willing to "stand in the spotlight" sometimes even though I feel like a totally inadequate example by comparison. God bless you and your family!

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  3. Aw, Dwija, this is so sweet! I especially love what that lady said when you smiled and chattered to baby Paul in the grocery store. Every baby should be so loved. What a great witness to a culture of life!

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  4. He was missing his kids! Good for you Dwija - instead of saying "None of your ding-dong business, old man!" You evangelized on the spot. Good job!

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  5. Replies
    1. There was a < SOB > in there, beforehand. Darn Google.

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  6. I love this. It's beautiful - thanks for sharing. How wonderful that we all have so many opportunities for interactions like this, as long as we're open to them.

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  7. You capture my heart.
    I'm off to Sam's..with a reformed way of thinking.
    muah!

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  8. I love realizing that these moments are happening when they happen. It's like a little glimpse of the Holy Spirit.

    I don't know if you read Heather's blog at Mama Knows, Honeychild, but her last post had a similar point, and they are both such great reminders to all of us moms out here!

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    1. Dang right this is a great reminder!:) Dwija, this is a SLAM DUNK! I really love the way you said that to him: "Is there anything better than family?" That was bold and beautiful. I am gonna use that line next time, because it's so true. Awesome post, and so cool how the Holy Spirit moves each of us and hits us with His inspiration. We're all in this together, for real:)

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  9. I had two men stop me in the grocery store last week and tell me that they wished they'd had more kids. Glad to be representing the Church with 4 kids (the 5th wasn't even with me at the time) in the middle of Walmart. Thanks for sharing! Wonderful perspective!

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  10. I hope I have a goo-goo-gaggle of babies around me one day. I don't want to wish away time though.

    And, today I was talking to one of Ellen's friend's mom. Ellen asked if we could take her girls to the grocery store with us. The mom and I laughed and laughed. Because, yes, who would do that???

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  11. That was truly TRULY beautiful. And so SO true. I try to remember that when I respond to people regarding the three in diapers I am currently blessed to be sportin' Good stuff and great reminders. THOUGH...I still can't figure out how to take them all to the grocery store because none of them are independent walkers yet. One day...

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  12. I am so glad that you wrote this. I tell my older kids all the time that because of our size (4 with one on the way) that people are always watching, that it can be good or bad. I encourage (beg them) to make it good - let's encourage people - let's show them big family awesome.

    It keeps me in check too, to take a deep breath, to try and show my joy even if I'm not feeling it at the moment.

    I have to warn them that sometimes people will be ugly to us, and it has happened, but how sad for those people!

    You struck gold with "Well, once they're grown, is there really anything better? Is there anything better than family?"

    I never comment because I feel like a goof. But you rocked this today. Totally rocked it. love it.

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  13. THis is such a good reminder...and maybe just what I need to try to be more engaging out in public. I tend to just shut down in the grocery store and try to just get in and out as soon as possible. I love all your comments and responses,,,so beautiful!

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  14. Awesome Dwija, and so true. It took me a LOT of trips to the grocery store to finally realize that MOSTLY people are curious and want to chat and are going to be perfectly pleasant. For so long I had my guard up, sure that I knew what they REALLY meant when they said things like "you've really got your hands full." But I started just answering with a smile instead of defensively and have had so so many lovely conversations with strangers since. That's my apostolate: Appearing in public with many children. :)

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  15. That last story gave me actual goosebumps. Thanks for passing on the inspiration!

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  16. <3 Love it - although when I took my 5 in 7 years out in the 1980's with the girls in denim jumpers- and me with no time for a haircut or makeup, we always were asked if we were Amish :)

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  17. I love this! The thing I struggle with lately is this: when they're young (defined loosely here to mean not grown) and you are in the throes of it all, it doesn't feel fun (Or like a party- kudos to you, mama!) It's so important to me to be a witness to the beauty of life with my 5 kids, but too often, there's little beauty or joy to show because I'm late, frazzled, and agitated with my darlings. So then I feel like a failure. Like instead of evangelizing the culture of life, I'm making people think 'THAT'S why I stopped at 2.'

    But I always look hopefully to the future, too. I'm constantly telling people (and myself!) to think how awesome my Thanksgiving table will be in 20 years. People seem to relate to that better.

    I've got to keep on praying and keep on trying with each new day, I guess.

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    1. I hear you, Lauren, sometimes I worry that I'm the poster child for why people should use birth control. I hope not but sometimes I do worry...

      And sometimes that picture of the future Thanksgiving table really keeps me going!

      BTW, the older gentleman...who's 33!!!

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  18. Yes!!! This!!

    It struck me the other day that I spend a lot of time being annoyed and defensive rather than being gracious and open with people's comments. Not a very good Christian example. It's nice to sit on a high horse about being open to life and following Church teachings and blahblahblah, and then getting my knickers in a twist if anyone comments on the closely spaced children. Such a wasted opportunity -- here I could be using it to share the joy & beauty of this philosophy and hopefully getting others to see things from my point of view.

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  19. Great post. A couple of years ago I was telling my husband I felt like I should be more involved in the local pro-life movement. "I should be and I could and then there's that conference and those prayer times...." He stopped me and told me I was a living breathing pro-life campaign every single time I loaded up the kids and took them somewhere. He was totally right! I thought I needed to be "doing" something when all I needed to do was what I was supposed to do and try to do it well.

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  20. Did you read the Mama Knows feather post last week? So similar! Loved her feather. Love that you are both so accepting of the state of whomever it is that questions/is intruiged by you. It's such a pregnant moment, pun totally not intended. So much potential there. Such a beautiful true experience.

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  21. Yes. I remember thinking once waaaayyyy back when I only had 2 littles that I wanted strangers to look at me and think, "Wow. She really likes her kids." The best days we have are when I put on that face. Because you know what? Thinking it, in this case, makes it true. I DO like my kids and even more so when I stop to smile at them. Wonderful, Dweej.

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  22. You're awesome. End of story. :-)

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  23. Wonderful, truly wonderful. My favorite thing about grocery stores and my large family are when the little old ladies come up and start talking about their Mama's and growing up with lots of brothers and sisters. The sweet fondness in their smiles always fills me up.

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  24. You're also street evangelizing here! We get to watch you be a witness to the faith through your loving embrace of all the crosses that come with being a wife and mother.

    I had the odd experience of a very nice lady I know telling me that I had a lot more to do with my life when I laughed about already having baby lust (#3 was 6 months old). I wasn't offended because it was an awesome moment to realize, "I haven't thought there was a more valuable career than raising a family in so long I can't remember. I'm all in, finally." You are ALL in, and it's very helpful to get to see someone juggle more than I am juggling and do it gracefully. It lets me know that I'm going to be okay, we're going to be okay, a large family is not exponentially more work than where I am right now. (Kids: Boy-5, Girl-2, Boy-7 months).

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  25. This is great Dwija. I only have two, but when I have my youngest in the Bjorn and am pushing our Dual Bob stroller, I often get the "you have your hands full" comment. It doesn't bug me because I do, and I think that is a good thing. The problem is I don't know what to say. What always comes to my mind is better full than empty, but I think that would probably come out wrong. Anyone have a good quick response to that statement?

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    1. No matter what anyone says, a smile and a "Thanks!" never seems the wrong choice. Whether they meant it negatively or positively, I think a happy response will always send the right message :).

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    2. Thanks for your response Dwija. I think I was overthinking it. :) Good suggestion.

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  26. I DO street evangelization and the rewards are out of this world. I am blessed to do it on the Las Vegas Strip in Las Vegas, Nevada too.
    Just chatting with people from all over the world about our Catholic Faith is amazing. Try it everyone. You'll like it.

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  27. Oh I am somehow just not getting around to reading it and it's excellent. Just thought I'd leave a comment to let you know I love the perspective and will try to adopt it next time I'm going crazy with armloads of kid-lets. :) God bless.

    <3 jeni

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