I spent the weekend obsessively checking the #edel14 hashtag, trying unsuccessfully to blue-skidoo into my screen. We also had to say 'no' to a big family reunion up north for many of the same reasons that I had to let that airplane out of Grand Rapids leave without me. But our annual three day parish festival is successfully on the books (despite the fact that I had to drive behind the procession on Sunday instead of walking [although Tommy tried to make me feel better by assuring me that the humidity level + bug count was severely uncomfortable. So nice of him] which is usually, like, my favorite activity of the year) and I know I was right where I needed to be.
I haven't blogged since Wednesday.
This summer has been crazy.
Many times I've editorialized about how I have so many more friends here than I was ever able to make in SoCal, but I'm starting to realize that not all of that was cultural. Some of that was....me. I didn't know how to make friends outside of work or school. Because I had only ever made friends in an organized, forced-proximity setting, it didn't occur to me that I had something to learn about initiating new relationships when the circumstances of my life changed so dramatically (ie: I became a stay at home mom with three kids and didn't know what the aych ee double hockey sticks I was doing).
Wanna know a secret? I'm naturally pretty shy. I'm not super good about making real eye contact. Truly. I've spent many a day feeling sure I could be great friends with that lady over there if only somehow I could submit a video audition or something and then have her schedule an interview and I could prepare a speech, maybe with an accompanying powerpoint presentation and THEN! Oh, then she would know I would make a great friend. But since I couldn't, I would just eat my donut and sip my coffee and then get in our car and go home.
The last four years have taught me a lot, and by a lot I mean I've decided on one magical phrase and I force myself to use it. A LOT. And even though all normal people reading this right now are like "what is this hair-brained woman going on about this time?" I'm going to share it with you because this is my blog and I couldn't think of anything else to talk about. Are you ready? Here it is:
[smile] "Hi, I don't think we've met." [stick out hand for the shaking]
My heart races every time I do it. No, really! It does! I feel like I'm about to give a presentation in front of 500 people. No, scratch that. I like giving presentations. Because the crowd is just A CROWD. Not one person into whose eyes I ought to look.
Wow, I sound like a complete psycho don't I?
Anyway. Now that I've said it, I'm not gonna erase it because I'm brave! And foolish! But just know that if I had gotten to go to Edel, y'all would've had to hear that phrase hundreds of times. Because I may have learned a lot in the last four years, but in terms of being a pony, I like to perfect just ONE trick.